Return to Nuke 'Em High Volume 1
“Totally on-the-nose slapstick satire... every scene has something wild in it” – Fred Topel, CRAVE ONLINE
Remember those sweet school days where you’d have sex in the janitor’s closet of Tromaville High, only to watch, in the throes of passion, as your significant other gets slimed by a leaking pipe and immediately proceeds to melt into a pile of goo before your very own, unconvincingly horrified eyes? No? Well, alright. Lloyd Kaufman is here to remind you what that’s like with the outrageous RETURN TO NUKE ’EM HIGH VOLUME 1! Yes, you read that right! A story so epic it could not be contained to a single film! With this near-remake of, and throwback/quasi-sequel to, the infamous CLASS OF NUKE ’EM HIGH (1986) and its two irradiated, oozing sequels, the Imperial is about to get thermonuclear!
The atomic high school has been rebuilt (again), and the nuclear power plant adjacent to Tromaville High School has been replaced, its two appropriately phallus-shaped reactors repurposed into Tromorgarnic Foodstuffs, a very conspicuous organic food factory which supplies the school cafeteria glowing, “green” tacos. One thing leads to the other, and the student body is quite literally transfigured — the Glee Club, most notoriously, transforming into a bunch of post-apocalyptic spawns from hell, a merry band of idiots you might remember from the first film as the Cretins! In the midst of it all, eco-blogger Chrissy (Asta Paredes) and bullied “rich girl” and duck owner Lauren (Catherine Corcoran) get down to business against mutants, bullies and monsters (but mostly on each other).
Filled with gratuitous sex, slime, blood and the raw idiocy you’ve come to expect from the fine folks at Troma Entertainment, this is the balls-to-the-walls sequel-remake-expansion pack to the NUKE ’EM HIGH films, an extravaganza you were perhaps not waiting for, but of which you’ll gleefully take two slimy servings. Brimming over with goofy jokes and throwbacks to the original trilogy, it’s a film that Troma themselves describes as commentary on pollution, waning global food supplies, bullying and LGBT rights — mind you, in ways that only Troma could ever comment on those things. Hazmat suit not included. Come prepared!
— Ariel Esteban Cayer